For the first and last time during the T20 cup - The Khush Khabree news bulletin, sponsored by TSN ( "Aik Jhoot aur saheeh"):

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1. Kumble is NOT commentating - he is back in India where he is busy looking after patients in Mumbai Central Hospital - Insomnia Wing...

2. The national committee for making temples in India has withdrawn temple building permits for all players until end of West Indies series...

3. Zardari's cable subscription has expired and he wont be able to watch or share in any happiness/sadness that results from the T20 final

4. The New Zealand board have presented Daniel Vettori with a new pram and protective netting – so that innocent passers by will not be injured by flying toys…

5. Graeme Smith’s South African team has won copyrights on a new cricketing term – Chokers

6. Mr. Modi of IPL fame has decided that he will never hold another IPL tournament within 4 years of any major tournament as it side effects cause instability in India

7. Lords groundstaff have banned Umer Gul from destroying the hallowed turf by bouncing his head, while missing a simple catch

8. Chris Gayle has announced that he would be happy with the demise of Test, ODI, T20 and all forms of French cricket

9. Afridi has decided to retire as Chairman of the League of Mediocre Gentleman – his position will now be taken up by Zaheer Khan of India

10. TSN announce a special award of a Mega Phainti, to be administered by Oxy Jan with Size 100 Chappal, to the winner of the PP’s “This team is useless” thread award.

[/quote]
 :ibutt